Men's Mutual Support Groups

Launch meeting

Benefits of joining a mutual support group

How the Mutual Support Groups work

Men's Mutual Support Groups take place online on the second and fourth Tuesday of each month.

The Mysterious Men meet at 11:30 am EST / 4:30 pm UK for 1.5 hours on Zoom.

The Bakers meet at 4 pm EST / 9 pm UK for 1.5 hours on Zoom.

Click here for a list of dates.

Each group will consist of a maximum of 10 people.

Each session, up to four people will share a challenge they currently have. The group will then help each work through his challenge by asking open questions to help him overcome the challenge. This is group coaching. I'll give all participants guidance in advance of their first session on the kinds of challenges and questions that can be brought.

Obviously, this means that not everyone will bring a challenge each session. But the beauty of the groups is that people will be going through similar challenges. So I guarantee that everyone who joins will gain each time you join.

I will provide clear guidance to all participants before the first full session so you can hit the ground running.

The cost of joining the group

Your first session is free.

After that, membership is £300 for three months (6 sessions max) or £540 for six months (12 sessions max).

For the first five members of the group, there is a 50% discount on membership: £150 for three months or £270 for six months.

Challenges you can bring

You can bring any challenge you have to the group that you feel the group can help you with.

These are examples of challenges I have discussed with one-to-one coaching clients who are similar in profile to the intended participants of each group. Each of these would be suitable to bring to a men's support group.

How to join

Joining the group is easy!

1. Watch the launch meeting above to learn about the groups.
2. Optional: Contact me if you're unsure that the group is for you. We can arrange a complimentary 30 minute chat.
3. Contact me stating that you'd like to be part of the group.
4. I'll send you the Code of Conduct and a contract. You must have returned a signed Code of Conduct to be invited to your first meeting.
5. I'll send you a Zoom link for the meeting.
6. Come to your first meeting and take part!

Code of conduct

These support groups are designed to be safe, confidential, supportive spaces.

Every member must agree to the following Code of Conduct.

"Me" in this Code of Conduct is the facilitator, Matthew. You can contact me on coaching@englishleathermaster.com

1. Confidentiality

• Respect Privacy: What is shared in the group stays in the group.
• Do not disclose any personal information shared by others outside the group.
• Do not screenshot or record any of the zoom meetings.
• When group discussions include people outside the group, try when possible to keep their identities confidential.
• Please use headphones if there are any other people who can overhear discussions.
• Don't join the meeting from a public place (eg a coffee shop).
• You are welcome to share your contact details with other members of the group, should you wish. However, you don't have to, and must not share details further without permission.
• Zoom names may include the full name of some participants, especially if they use Zoom for work purposes. Do not share members' identities with anyone outside the group.

2. Respect

• Be Kind and Considerate: Treat all group members with respect and kindness. Listen actively and avoid interrupting others.
• No Judgement: Approach all discussions with an open mind and refrain from judging others.
• No shame: don't  kink shame or slut shame.
• Respect views: Try to be respectful of others' political views, religious views and experience.
• Please respect others by keeping your clothes on.

3. Participation

• Limit storytelling and asking for details: This is a support group to help people. Give as much of the story as people need to understand your challenge, but don't give details they don't need. Likewise, as much as we all want to know the details, please don't ask for them if you don't need them to understand the challenge.
• Engage Actively: Participate in group activities and discussions to the best of your ability. Your contributions are valuable.
• Respect Boundaries: Understand that everyone has different comfort levels. Respect each other’s boundaries and consent.
• Don't hog attention. Each person has a right to speak. Keep your contributions short. Don't ask multiple questions if others want to ask questions.
• Please keep your microphone unmuted throughout the session unless there is noise in your background.
• All members must remain on camera throughout. People are sharing their stories. They have the right to know if you're listening or not.
• The facilitator, Matthew, has final decisions on all participation. Please follow all instructions.

4. Inclusivity

• This is a group for gay, bisexual and queer men. I believe that men in these groups have unique needs in life and can help each other. I'm sorry if you don't feel included in this description. If in doubt, please contact me and we can have a chat about whether this is the right group for you.
• Trans men are men. Non-binary people are welcome to join if they are male presenting.
• Use Inclusive Language: Use language that is respectful and inclusive of all group members. Respect each others' pronouns.
• This is a group that requires group working. For some neurodivergent people, this may not be the right group for you. Please contact me if you are unsure.

5. Advice and Constructive Feedback

• It is always better to ask an open question than to give advice.
• When you do give advice, ask permission first and give it lightly. No one is under any obligation to take your advice.
• Give Constructive Feedback: Offer feedback in a constructive and supportive manner.
• Receive Feedback Gracefully: Be open to receiving feedback from others, understanding it is intended to support your growth.

6. No Discrimination or Harassment

• Zero Tolerance: Discrimination, harassment, or any form of bullying will not be tolerated.
• No -isms (racism, sexism, ableism etc) or phobias (homophobia, transphobia etc)
• There is a three strike policy on low level discriminatory or harassing behaviour.
• The first time something happens, a public warning will be issued. Sometimes people don't understand their own behaviours and this is designed to help people learn.
• The second time something happens, that participant will be removed from that week's group.
• Before being allowed to re-join, the participant must have a one-to-one conversation with me to discuss their behaviour.
• If, on any subsequent occasion, the same participant displays discrimination or harassment, they will be banned for life. No refunds will be issued for memberships paid.
• I reserve the right to ban someone from a meeting, or for the group for life if they display unacceptable behaviour.

7. Commitment

• Be Punctual: Attend sessions regularly and arrive on time. No one will be admitted if more than 5 minutes late.
• The Zoom room will open 5 minutes before start time to allow you to check your connection and audio etc.
• If you cannot attend, inform me in advance.
• Be Present: Close all other tabs on your browser and turn your phone on Do Not Disturb to remain focused on the group. Don't answer messages, doom scroll or surf the net while participating. We can always tell.
• For the avoidance of doubt, the group will run every session unless cancelled in advance. Memberships are time based. Missed sessions can't be made up.
• If there are less than 3 group members present, the time will be shortened to 1 hour and the session will be run as one or two one-to-one coaching session(s).

8. Responsibility

• Own Your Actions: Take responsibility for your words and actions within the group.
• Seek Support When Needed: If you need additional support, contact me.

9. If things go wrong

• If you have a problem with a participant:
• If you can, speak to the participant directly. Some people don't recognise the effect of their actions or words.
• If you don't feel you can do this, contact me and I will discuss the next steps with you.
• If you have a problem with the group:
• Refunds are only available in exceptional circumstances: less than four signed up members, group cancellation, long-term illness and similar circumstances. Refunds are at the discretion of English Leather Master Coaching.
• Please speak to me if the group is not supporting you in the way you hoped. I will do all I can to make the group work for all if possible.
• If you have a problem with me, the facilitator
• Talk to me. Let's sort things out.

By adhering to this code of conduct, we create a safe, respectful, and supportive environment for all members to thrive.

Dates for support groups